The adult children of an overtly religious man, accused of murdering his wife three decades ago, say the turbulent marriage was marked by control.
Sporting a long beard like his alleged murderer father, Phillip Govendir took his time answering questions from crown prosecutor Chris Taylor in his father's NSW Supreme Court trial on Tuesday.
"The rules were always quite clear," the son told the court on Tuesday.
"As a very young child, dad would talk about the guiding hands," he said, motioning his hands to explain dating non-Jewish people was considered taboo.
Aaron Govendir, 83, pleaded not guilty to murdering Denise Govendir at their home in Sydney's Dover Heights on March 10, 1998.
He is accused of bludgeoning his wife to death and waiting until her body went cold to call triple zero.
Phillip Govendir said he moved out of home to "spread my wings", after putting up with his "passive-aggressive" father, who controlled his mother.
"There was care, there was love, there was also control," he told the court.
His sister Tahli said her mother, who worked in senior roles at Women's International Zionist Organisation NSW branch, endured insults and rudeness from her father in front of others.
He was particularly irate at her wearing make-up and perfume as well as her cooking, she said.
"There were a lot of arguments and disagreements," Tahli told the court.
"A lot of conversations were designed to embarrass or chastise."
The parents had been married for 30 years but their union was "plagued by arguments" and weathered a six-month separation, the court heard.
The daughter recounted how she also had a fraught relationship with her father because she had a non-Jewish partner.
The jury heard on Monday how the accused staged a fictitious, violent home invasion replete with cable ties and duct tape to cover up her murder after she asked him for a divorce.
Earlier on Tuesday, defence lawyer Brendan Green urged jurors to keep open minds and consider all evidence before deciding the elderly man's fate.
"You may find a natural inclination to want to find someone for the death of a mother," he told the jury.
"This is not a whodunnit. This is a criminal trial."
A 28-minute silent video of the crime scene captured by police at the time of the murder was broadcast to the jury as evidence.
Two minutes into the footage, Govendir, wearing a blue kippah, began to cry, prompting Justice Sarah McNaughton to order a brief break.
After the trial resumed, he laid his head on clasped hands in the dock as the rest of the video played.
It showed a blood-stained blue bedsheet as well as cable ties and grey duct tape.
Before her death, Ms Govendir, 53, had spoken to a lawyer about seeking a divorce and her wish to amicably divide their assets, the court heard on Tuesday.
Govendir received some $30,000 from her will after she died.
Paramedics found Ms Govendir's cold body in a pool of blood with her feet cable-tied together.
